In no particular order, here are some of the things that only those who have the privilege of owning a cat will understand.
1. First up, let’s correct that previous sentence: “owning a cat”? Ha! If you’ve got a cat, you know that you're not their owner, you're their staff.
2. Waking up to your cat purring in your face is your favourite way to start the day…
3. However, your day usually starts with your cat’s butt in your face. You know that cats have absolutely zero sense of personal space and that this is the ultimate sign of affection (or that they’re just showing you who’s in charge).
4. You’ve accepted the fact that, no matter how often you vacuum or use a lint roller, cat hair is going to be everywhere. Always. Fur real!
5. Similarly, you know that clean laundry = cat nest. They just love adding that special finishing touch to your lovely clean clothes… cat hair.
6. You never know if your cat wants to cuddle you, or bite you. They run as hot and as cold as your taps… and you love them for it. Weirdo.
7. Your cat has a special meow to get your attention, and it’s irresistible. And don’t they bloody know it?!
8. Cats sleep all the time… except for the hour or so before you get up. That’s the time when they’ll be 100% awake and ready to play. Weekends included.
9. There’s nothing cuter than your cat’s toe beans.
10. You say you love cats and dogs equally… but you're totally lying.
11. Putting any item on any surface is an invitation for your cat to push it off. They’ll probably even look you in the eye while they're doing it.
12. Keeping your study/home office cat-free is virtually impossible. Warm laptops and massage tables (sorry, we mean keyboards) are magnets to moggies.
13. If you have guests over, your cat will want to make a diva entrance like it’s on RuPaul’s Drag Race.
14. Checking for lumps before you sit down is second nature to you.
16. For pets that sleep for most of the day, cats sure do manage to get up to a lot of mischief.
15. The lower half of all your timber or upholstered furniture is RUINED.
17. You understand that whatever you buy for your cat, they're still going to prefer the cardboard box it came in. Especially the Katz-Loo boxes!
18. And that even though you spend a fortune on cat toys, your precious puss has much more fun playing with a paper bag.
19. You know your cat is a little bugger. And you find it utterly adorable.
20. This is how you react when someone says they’re “not a cat person”.
